Episode 1: Blair Linne: Can God really change me as I open up my Bible?

23 Jan

We're thrilled to be joined by Blair Linne for the beginning of our next season, as we consider the question: Can God really change me as I open up my Bible? Blair is a Bible teacher, actress, spoken word artist, and the creator of the podcast GLO with The Gospel Coalition. She is also the author of Finding My Father and Made To Tremble.

1. What struck you from our conversation with Blair?
2. How has this grown your view of how God's word can change you, even if your circumstance does not change?
3. Who can you encourage off the back of this conversation today?
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The following is an uncorrected transcript generated by a transcription service. Before quoting in print, please check the corresponding audio for accuracy.
Felicity: You're listening to the Two Sisters and a Cup of Tea podcast, the Bible Study podcast for everyday life. We're here for a 20 minute burst of Bible chat over a cup of tea and an English style biscuit as we make our way through a Bible book over the course of the season and drive it to our hearts. As we begin the new year, we're thinking through the question of whether God can really change us as we open up our Bibles. It was a joy to welcome Blair Linne onto the podcast to talk through this question alongside hearing about her excellent new book, Made to Tremble. We hope you enjoy the conversation as much as we did
Sarah: Before we get there though, we're delighted that 10ofthose.com is partnering with us to bring you this season. 10ofthose is a Christian book ministry that sells carefully selected resources that point to Jesus. We love knowing that whenever we shop at 10ofthose or point others to their website, that they'll only be biblically faithful and trustworthy books. On top of that, they discount everything they sell to make the resources as accessible and affordable as possible. We share their heart as they firmly believe that books that point to Jesus can change lives. We're always recommending books and we have a bookstore with 10ofThose to make it easy to get hold of them. So visit 10ofThose.com/twosisters for all our topics. Why not bookmark that page now? Shopping through our 10ofThose bookstore helps make this podcast possible. As you seek to grow in faith or introduce others to Jesus, head over to 10ofThose.com, resources that point to Jesus at great prices.
Felicity: Welcome to Two Sisters and a Cup of Tea. My name is Felicity and I'm here with my sister, Sarah, as ever, but this episode, we're delighted to have Blair Linne with us. Blair is a Bible teacher. She's written a couple of books. I've been so privileged to get to know her this year. She's an all-round, wonderful human. We're delighted to be having this conversation with you, Blair. Tell us a bit about yourself. Where are you as we speak? What's going on in your life?
Blair: Yeah, well thank you guys for having me. It's really a blessing to be able to be with you guys today. I currently live in Dallas, Texas. We just moved here about five months ago and we love it. We love the sunshine and it's close to the airport, all the things. ⁓ I've been married for 15 years to my husband, Shai. We have three children. We were home schooling, but we had to abort that. So about a week ago or two weeks ago, my husband was like, yeah, I can't see it again to a brick and mortar school. I was like, I think they do too. So, so they're in school. They've been in school for about a week in a brick and mortar school. So we praise God for that. So grateful for the moments of home schooling and so grateful for the moments when they go away to school. So, yeah, no, yeah, you need to need to know, know your limits, know what you need.
Felicity: That's a good honesty in that. Self-awareness is a good thing in that.
Blair: So it's been all around good and it's been helpful too because we are in a new city. So giving our kids a chance to get to know more people and develop friendships, it's been really sweet. yeah, this season, it's like writing and teaching the Bible and also traveling with my husband, leading conferences on family worship. I'm just so grateful to be able to be here and to serve the church
Sarah: Wonderful. Sounds full and rich in many ways. Any tea or biscuits that like to accompany you on this, you know, life journey?
Blair: Yes, there definitely is. was thinking, you know, well, in maybe 2008, a long, long time ago, I got invited to London for the first time to minister at the Notting Hill Carnival to share spoken word and also to evangelize on the streets there. And I was hosted by a wonderful group. And one of the things that they did was they introduced me to an English cup of tea.
Felicity: Amazing.
Sarah: I'm so glad they did.
Blair: And I have not looked back since, like it is my favourite. So I love black tea, milk and sugar, you know, all of the things and, and I love a good biscuit. Yeah. So yeah. Shortbread. I know. Listen, I am your third. I'm your sister. Listen, you know, this is my spot, Yeah. So I feel at home.
Felicity: I mean, you've gone up in my estimation, I mean.
Sarah: Amazing. Brilliant, love that so much. Really, really great. Well Blair, we're digging into the question today of whether God can really change us as we open up our Bibles day by day. And we wanted to start by just thanking you for writing such a powerful and profoundly helpful book. You've just written a book called Made to Tremble, where you chronicle your debilitating journey with anxiety and what it's looked like for you to truly lean on and lean into the Word of God through it all. I wonder whether you can just tell us something of the journey the Lord has brought you on in that and how you've seen Him change you as you've opened your Bible.
Blair: Yeah, so, you know, I say in the book, I initially met anxiety in 2015 after a bad car accident with a deer that totalled our car. initially we thought we were fine physically, but it spiralled me into a season of panic attacks and all types of symptoms. And it was, you know, it's interesting when you're like one panic attack in, you know, dealing with anxiety and you think, okay. You know, this is strange, this is new, I'm not sure exactly what's happening. But then when you're kind of maybe 10 panic attacks in and you're a few years in, I think really caused us as a family, we were a young family in ministry. We had moved to Philadelphia to help plant a church. We had three kids, three and under at the time. And so, you you're like, oh, is this the way things will always be? And certainly anyone who's experienced anxiety and panic attacks, you know how difficult it is. And for those who maybe haven't experienced it, panic attack, literally you feel like it's a medical emergency. You feel like you're dying. You're like something's heavy on your chest. You're hyperventilating, know, shallow breathing. Your heart is pounding. For me, it would manifest in headaches and nausea and dizziness and feeling lightheaded and having to learn to drive all over again because the terror of what if another deer tends to come on the road again. And wrestling with the Lord over that, I remember, you know, during that, the thick of it, I was in bed for about three weeks because I would try to make dinner, but I couldn't, you know, I would feel faint. So I couldn't enjoy dinner with my family. I just needed to lay down. And I began reading through books, trying to find encouragement and reading the scripture, trying to find encouragement, trying to find the Lord in the midst of it. And really, I think in a state of some sorrow because I had condemned myself quite often. I was isolated because anxiety can feel that way. There's a lot of shame that can be attached to it. What's wrong with my faith? Other people who had dealt with anxiety and who had come to me years prior, I would say, just read more scripture, pray more. And so I'm like, well, this is different, you know, I'm not doubting God. I am in the scripture. And so I want God to change my circumstances. What I realized in the moment, in those moments or those years is that the Lord is able to change my circumstances because he's all powerful. But even more so than changing my circumstances, the Lord wanted to change me. And I, you know, I really had to wrestle with that reality in my weakness. I'm kind of like the three Hebrew boys, you know, in the fiery furnace. It's like, I know my God can deliver me, but even if he doesn't deliver me, you know, I will continue to hope in him. And that really changed everything where I realized, okay, well, anxiety, what it's doing is it's highlighting my weakness and it's highlighting my inability to change my circumstances, you I'm not in control of the deer. I'm not in control of the things that I'm concerned about right now, you know, with related to my young family, you know, or the church and the ministry that we're doing or my children. God is in control. He has full resources, sufficient resources to handle these things, which are too wonderful for me, you know, as the Psalm says, you know. My mind has been set on these things that are too wonderful for me, right? But Lord, help me to quiet my soul like a weaned child with its mother. And the only way to do that is for me to rehearse who my God is in the midst of it and to rehearse his goodness in the midst of it. To say that even if I suffer the rest of my life with anxiety and panic attacks, I will hope in God, very similar to Job, who also had that perspective. Job said, the very thing I feared has come upon me. And yet we know God vindicated him. said, he's righteous, he's suffering, but he's a righteous man. And at the end of Job's story, he said, my ears had heard of you, but now I see you, I see you in a new way. And I believe that when it comes to suffering we have the privilege of seeing God in a new way. So what I had to do was open up the scripture in its context, because there were scriptures that I would use and almost use it against myself. know, do not fear, which is the most often used command in the scripture. But I wasn't reading it or understanding it in its context. You know, Isaiah 41, 10, it says, do not fear for I am with you, you know. Do not be afraid for I am your God. I will strengthen you. I will help you. I will hold on to you with my righteous right hand. And so seeing that text in its context, it changes everything. It changes how I view my God, how I view my suffering to know that my God is gonna be with me in the midst of it and that he's gonna be my help. Even if I have to endure this and I have to long suffer, right? Or suffer for a long time. My God is changing me, morphing me, helping me to look more like him in the process. So that's why I say how anxiety became the best thing that ever happened to my faith, because it was not to be used as a tool to condemn me or to push God away, but in the midst of it, I was able to see God more clearly.
Felicity: Wow. Love that that's so profound and that our eyes would be lifted that the Lord would be using it in order to lift our eyes and to see not only the Lord but also what he is doing in us. That sounds like an intense season. I imagine that it's maybe a season that doesn't really end in the sense that anxiety will always be slightly hovering there. But as you've maybe come out of the real intensity of that season, how then has the word continued to be at work in you over, well, let's just think over the last couple of months. In your everyday life right here and now, what does that look like for you practically for the word to be at work in you?
Blair: Yeah, you know, it is continuing to ask that I remember even and I continue to pray and say, Lord, because I'm not feeling anxious all day every day like I was when I was in the thick of that battle for those years. But there are moments, as you said, anxiety still comes. And one of the things that I often pray is, Lord, even if you completely take this away, you know, where to get to a point where I never feel anxious ever again, you know, which I believe certainly in glory, it will be that way. But don't let me lose what you've taught me and what you're teaching me in the midst of this. and really that is that place of being aware of my weakness, being aware of my neediness, being thirsty for the only one who can satisfy, who says, come, come, you don't have to buy or buy without money. Take in this living water. I'm like, Lord, lead me to the rock that is higher than I. Lead me to yourself. And I'm often reminded of even how Paul, he says, three times I prayed and asked the Lord to take away the torn in my side. And what was so beautiful about that is, you know, Paul is pointing to the fact that this is right where we need to be, this state of weakness, this state of dependability, like depending upon the Lord. And that's what I learned. And that's what I, I pray I will never let go of because what it does is it causes me to run to God, to run to his word, to realize that I can't do anything in my own strength, not anything that's going to be of any value you know, there's a passage in Colossians, which speaks of Christ, the Christ hymn, which I love. And it talks about how, you know, Christ is supreme, right? He's preeminent over things visible and invisible. There's this whole list of all the things that Christ is over. But it speaks about how he's holding the universe together with the word of his power. And when we realize that the suffering that we deal with in our life is leading us to that point of realizing how much we need the only one who has it all in his hand. He's got the whole world in his hand. He's got the whole universe and he's holding it up. So in order for me to breathe right now, God is doing that. In order for me to open up the scripture and be able to understand the word, God is doing that. For me to be able to see him and know him, God is doing that. For me to be able to tie my shoe and have this conversation, know, like God is doing it all. And, but, we, we, we so often think that we can do something in ourselves, but that dependence, that's why we run to the word. We run to him because we are convinced if left to ourselves like nothing good will come. All good is in him.
Felicity: It's interesting though, isn't it? Because I wholeheartedly agree and that is exactly where it's at. it's almost counterintuitive to pray that we would know our weakness. Instinctively, we want to pray, Lord, help me feel confident so I can do your work. we backtrack back to the place, like a wrong place. But I love what you're saying there about as we sit in our weaknesses, we acknowledge that as we essentially as we see God to be God and us to be us, the limitations of being human but also the joy of God being our God, then that is such a root kind of change in thinking, I think.
Sarah: But the way you're talking, Blair, yeah, so, so helpful to hear this. I'm so helpful to hear the journey that you've been on. The Lord has so obviously been at work in you through this immense journey that he's taken you on. But it also sounds like graft. Like it sounds like, you know, there's been labour there, there's been work there for you to dig into his word and really kind of grapple with who he is and his and just his sovereignty over your situation even when your circumstance isn't changing or it's getting worse or better, whatever it is. I wonder whether you can just speak into a little bit of, for people, just that kind of reality that actually sometimes it doesn't feel always delightful to be wrestling with his word. It doesn't always feel like an enriching thing sometimes to come to the word when you're battling with these circumstances when something feels so pressing on you. Even when it doesn't feel like he's changing you in the moment. What persuades you to keep picking up your Bible and keep asking God to work? Can you just kind of speak into that a little bit for us?
Blair: Yeah, you know, it's it is knowing that God is honest. It is knowing that what he has communicated in his word, he will fulfill it. You know, there's a scripture in Philippians, chapter one, verse six, which says, being confident in this very thing, he that hath begun a good work in you will perform it until the day of Christ Jesus. And so, you know, knowing truths about who God is. He is not a man that he should lie. The scripture says, right? Like what he says is truth. He is the truth. And so all throughout the word, we get promise after promise after promise about what God says he will do in the life of those who seek his word. You know, like, and so holding on to that truth. it's interesting because even thinking about anxiety, you think of the well-known passage in Philippians, which at the end there, Philippians four, it talks about, you know, the importance of holding on to that which is true, right? That which is excellent and is of good report and on and on. And so how do we do that? We do that by opening up the scriptures. We do that by saying, not only am I gonna open it up, I'm not gonna go based upon how I feel. I'm going to open it up and continue to pour, sow seeds so that I can live off of this harvest. And that's what we do. We're basically living off of the harvest today and the seeds that we planted yesterday. And trusting that God is going to bring the harvest. He is going to increase this work and the truth of the scriptures in our lives. He's trustworthy. He's faithful. So it really goes back to his character. He is the God who is gracious. He is the God who loves us with tender mercy. And so he does not lie. He's not like us. You know what I mean? Like, when we say something, even if we have good intent, we may not follow through. He is not that way. He always fulfills his promise. His word will never return void.
Felicity: Yeah. Love that, love that. And that's so true. think that Sarah and I would both testify to that being true. The daily deposits of just being in the Word, then the harvest of that. I love the way you've put that, the seeds that then reap the harvest and that God is faithful in that. We love to be in the Bible together and we're always encouraging our listeners to grab a sister, grab a friend and get into the Word with other people. I know that you love to be in the Word with other people as well. Hey, can you share some of the joys of seeing God at work in others as you open up the Bible in community?
Blair: Yeah, yeah, it is a joy. It is a joy. And one of the things that, you know, I want to commend firstly, I think is the local church, you know, to be able to be rooted in a church where the word of God is going forth and it is being handled well, right? Where there are pastors who care about God's word and and they believe in the discipleship of the church with the primary means of discipleship is through Sunday morning gathering. But then also I think about the call to discipleship that we all have as believers, right? That we're called to pour into one another. I love, that discipleship is just helping a believer learn to be a follower of Christ in belief, in affection and in practice. And so this, what this says, and we see this again and again in the scripture, often, especially in the New Testament with this plural you, that we're not an island. We can't do this alone. We are called to be serving one another. And one way that we do that is through the word. That means that I need to be in the word, but also I need to be encouraging other believers, believers who might be younger in the faith than I, to say, let's walk alongside each other. And one of the things that I think we can neglect this, but it is a means of grace in our life to pour into other believers. And it's beautiful to see someone that you are discipling or you've discipled be in a position where they're ministering to you. But sometimes it's in the course of that process where you're pouring into them, the Lord is also ministering to you because you see the word working in their life. You see fruit in their life because sometimes, you know, we can get discouraged. like, am I bearing fruit? You know, what's going on here? Cause we're chugging along. not, our eyes aren't on the fruit. Our eyes are really to be on the gardener, you know, but the Lord, I think gives us the ability to peer into the lives and the fruitfulness of others that we pour into and it's such an encouragement, or you see them repenting of sin and you're like, yeah, I need to repent of that. You know, like we are here to serve one another and love one another and care for one another. And I just think it is a means that we ought not to neglect because, you know, when we see the Lord saving someone, right? When we evangelize to someone and we see them come to the faith, it's like, Lord, you're still saving, you know, like your word is true. It just points us right back to what we know is true about God. And it just confirms it. And it kind of, it roots those seeds, I think a little deeper, you know, in us. So we're like, yes, praise the Lord, you know. Or we see someone being baptized. Like, praise the Lord, you're working. You're working and the Holy Spirit is ministering and it encourages us all over again. So yeah, that discipleship, whether that's one-on-one or in a group setting, I think is so vital for our growth and our encouragement. And it does bring so much joy to the body of Christ, it's a good word, the joy that comes.
Sarah: And it brings confidence, doesn't it? Because as you say, you see the Lord at work in others and you go, yes, he is at work. And whilst I may not always be seeing it in my own heart, actually, when someone else comes alongside me and says, want to encourage you in this way, or I do that to someone else, you're like, yes, Lord, this is the kind of wonderful gift we are to one another as we build one another up, aren't we? And as we see his word at work in people's lives, it's so good. Well Blair, we kind of draw this conversation to a close, we just wanted to kind of dig in a little bit to just what it looks like to apply God's Word to our hearts. So for those of us wanting to lean into what God is doing in us as we open our Bibles, we just wondered are there any questions that you tend to ask yourself or refrains that you find helpful as you seek to apply the Bible to your heart on a kind of regular basis as you go about opening your Bible.
Blair: Yes, there are lots of questions I'm asking. I'm like, how much time you got? No. Yeah. So, you know, when I open up, when I open up the Bible, I think the first, the first question that I'm asking is, is what's the context? And I mentioned that earlier, you know, what is the author's intent? Who is the author? You know, I think some of those basic questions can be helpful to say who's writing here and who are they writing to and what is the intent of the author. I remember, you know, being an English major and having many classes where Felicity and I, we shared our love for literature and poetry. And I remember being in one class where I was analysing a poet. And I remember my professor, he really got on me because I was saying, you know, this poet, his love for God is, and he was like, wait, this poet is an atheist you're reading something into the text that is not there because a lot of my teachers would just kind of say, you know, it's up to you. What do you think? You know, the author means he said, no, you have to know the actual author's intent in order to understand true meaning. So that is really important. Thankful for that professor. You know, so what is the author's intent, but then also to dig in and say, where is God here? What does this passage say about the Lord? And you can look at it from a Trinitarian view. What does it say about the Father? What does it say about the Son? What does it say about the Holy Spirit? Where is the gospel here in this passage? Are there any commands in this passage? Are these commands for me or are these commands for someone else? And if they're for me, you know, to say, okay, Lord, is there any sin that I need to put off? Are you calling me by the power of the Holy Spirit to put on anything based upon this passage? And what I mean by that is sins that need to be repented, but also how do I walk in newness of life? You know, scripture talks about in Christ how all things have been made new. And so we're constantly thinking through this death to ourself, which really is the gospel, this death to ourself, and then this resurrection by the power of the Spirit. So how do I apply that? But I think that overarching question, the big question that I'm always wanting to come back to is, how do I know God? How is this passage leading me to God? Because I don't want to just gain information. I don't wanna just say, look, I know this. I can talk about the hypostatic union. That term isn't in the Bible. I can talk about Jesus being 100% God, 100% man, or I have all these theological concepts in my mind and I know how to define theology and justification and sanctification and propitiation, you know, like we have these big terms. I always want to come back to, okay, not so much the terms. It's, it's where is this leading me to? Who is this leading me to? I think that's my big aim for me personally, when it comes to the scripture. You know, yeah, where is God here? Because I want to behold Him. I want to behold Him and I want to believe in Him. And so I want my faith to be strengthened. So I'm going to pray and ask the Holy Spirit to do what only God can do, which is to make me more like God, to make me more like Him so that it actually works itself out. I my life and how I'm by God's grace, the hands and the feet of Christ. I love my neighbour. I love my husband, I love my kids, you know. How do I serve in my church? What does this look like when I go out and I'm trying to be mindful of evangelism, my discipleship and being other centered? That's all kind of working out of this, okay, Lord, I wanna know you and I wanna look like you. And that's my aim.
Felicity: I love that, and as you're speaking, I'm like, well, I should just go get my Bible open now. This is exactly what we need to be doing. Love the way you infuse and talk about and the joys of that. And that's exactly it, isn't it? As we behold the Lord. And that is exactly what the Holy Spirit is seeking to do is to floodlight, to point us in that direction. And I like what we saying earlier that the faithfulness of God, the seeds are planted and the harvest will be reaped and the harvest being in many ways that beholding of the Lord. yeah, well, Blair, I mean, we're just so grateful for this conversation. What an engaging, enthusing, just as I say, I hope that everyone who's listening wants to, you know, switch this off and go and grab the word and get it open. And this is releasing in January and sometimes January can feel like, well, we've got all the resolutions, but are we gonna carry on past the 6th of January? But actually, I feel this conversation prompts us to keep getting that word open.
Sarah: Blair would you just pray for us as we close? you pray for our listeners? That would just be really really helpful as we close. Thank you.
Blair: Yes. Oh God, we thank you that you are God and we are not God. That you are God, means that you are good. It means that you are holy. It means that you are all powerful, that you are immutable. You never change. We thank you that you are eternal and matchless and majestic. And you are also benevolent. You're good. You're merciful. You're gracious to us, Lord. We just come before you right now, just crying out to you, asking you to do in us what we cannot do ourselves, asking you to help us to know you better. We pray that you would fill us with all the fullness of God. We pray that you would fill us with your spirit so that we might be able to behold you today. Give us a hunger and a thirst for your word and a thirst for righteousness Lord. Help us to tremble before you in reverence and awe and to prioritize time with you in your word. We thank you that when we do that you have promised to change us, to transform us so that we look more like Christ. We thank you for all of these things we pray in the name of Jesus. Amen.
Sarah: Amen.
Felicity: Well, we are really grateful 10 of those are sponsoring this season and they have a discount on your, a 25% discount on your book. between now and the end of February, if you enter in the discount code, twosisterstremble for our listeners put that into the Ten of Those website and there you will get a discount on Blair's excellent book that we would highly recommend and I think that's it Sarah.
Sarah: Well Blair, thank you so much for your time. We've really just so enjoyed this conversation and as Felicity said that book is on offer at the moment, 25% discount with the code TWOSISTERSTREMBLE. Do go and grab your copy there and we look forward to seeing everyone next Friday as we kick off our season in John's Gospel chapters 12 through 17. Do join us for the start of that season and we'll see you then. Bye Bye.
This episode has been sponsored by 10ofthose.com.